Chels

This week, I discovered that I actually already had a copy of Mrs Dalloway. 

I’m not a book collector, not in the sense of wanting to own multiple copies of books (except for my Frankenstein collection – but that’s necessary, I tell myself, because I studied the multiple editions). I’m quite happy to own one version (usually the cheapest) and enjoy it. I am, however, a book collector in the sense that I like to keep the books I read. You never know when you’ll want to reread.

I read a lot over lockdown, so I also regularly bought new books to replenish my stock. Outside of that year, I’ve never really been big on splurging on book hauls – I would always just keep a list going through the year of books I’d like and ask for them for Christmas or my birthday, so my to-read list was pretty manageable.

In the last few years I’ve read significantly less from my bookshelves since I’ve been focused on academic reading (and I certainly don’t want to fork out £60 a time to own textbooks), so I’ve been getting through my books at a much slower rate. In 2020 I must have read upwards of 50 books, but now I’m averaging 25 a year, with a lot of them being textbooks or borrowed novels rather than from my own shelves.

I’m very aware of conscious consumption, and in most areas of my life, I’m pretty good at it. I don’t often buy things, and when I do buy clothes, they’re often secondhand. Really, I just hate spending money. I’d rather save it. Books, on the other hand, are my weakness. Since I slowed down my reading, I’ve racked up quite a collection that I’m yet to read.

My 2025 resolution is to end the year with at the absolute most half the number of unread books on my shelf than I started with. Whether that’s through reading them, or donating the books that I’m pretty sure I won’t ever get around to reading, as long as I end the year at the magic number. In the spirit of confessing to my mistakes, that number is 25. I started 2025 with 50 unread books. It’s shameful, really. 

Now that I’m out of uni, though, I can hopefully get back into reading for pleasure more frequently and make a dent in them.

Anyway, back to Mrs Dalloway. I truly do not know how I forgot that I already owned it. Normally, I’m pretty good at remembering what I do and don’t have. But my classics shelf is overflowing, and my Penguin English Library editions are half hidden behind some trinkets, so maybe not seeing it every day made it slip my mind. 

I’m not fully blaming myself, though. Half of the blame has to go to TKMaxx, surely. Ever since they’ve been stocking collectors editions of classics I’ve been drawn to them, almost against my will. That’s a bit dramatic, but it’s how I feel when I get to the book section. The collector’s edition of Mrs Dalloway is £9.99 on the Wordsworth website, and it was only £5.99 at TKMaxx. If there’s one thing that draws me in more than a pretty book, it’s a bargain. I restrained myself, too, at least I thought, and only bought Mrs Dalloway and Alice in Wonderland when I went. Alice, which I’d read as an ebook when I was young and wanted to reread, and Mrs Dalloway, which I’d always fancied reading but hadn’t gotten around to buying (or so I thought).

I only realised my mistake when I went to choose my next book from my list to read, and saw the Penguin English Library version of Mrs Dalloway looking back at me. Oops.

The real positive to this happening is that it assured me that I chose a good goal for the year. Having so many unread books that I can’t keep track and accidentally buy a duplicate is a pretty good indicator that I have too many, and I need to get through what I already own before I consume more. It’s like project pan, but for the bookshelf.

Have you ever made the same mistake as me? Please say you have, it’ll make me feel less ashamed of myself.